Fetch this, Fido!

If some nitwit threw a stick and wanted you to fetch it, would you?  Hopefully, not.  Although maybe the  the stick should be retrieved and used to beat some sense into the stick tossing nitwit. 

If somebody commanded you to sit and then when you did, he handed you a dog cookie, would you wag your tail?  Or would you tear the jerk's arm off?  Keep in mind that tail waggers would probably also hold still for bows, bandanas and doggie diapers.

Claims that obedience is a sign of intelligence are extremely misleading.  Sure, Crazy Dog Men do use traits like train-ability and obedience as tests.  But what these tests are really designed for is to ensure the dog isn't smarter than its owner.  This innate canine intelligence is probably why so many good dogs wind up in shelters.  No stupid human wants to be outsmarted by a brainy animal.  It makes the human look so bad.

Did you ever notice how many dogs and their humans resemble each other?  Like attracts like.  It's obvious a drooling, slobbering, jowly human would be seriously out-classed by a sleek brainy German Shepherd.  And no explanation is needed as to why a person would be drawn to one of those obnoxious little yappy dogs complete with mange.

Mind you, I'm not judging Crazy Dog Men for sticking to their own kind.  It gives one an instant excuse: 
 "That smell?  Oh, that's just Rover.  He always gets a little gassy when I drink beer."
"Why is my chin and the front of my shirt wet ?  'Cause Fido always drools at company picnics.  Must be the heat or something.  Hey, Fido, pull my finger!"

It isn't really ethical to put a dog in a shelter just because his IQ is higher than yours.  Still, these Crazy Dog Men might be on to something.  I am owned by a cat that is much smarter than me.  And possibly life might have been easier if I had been the brainy one.  But there are no fetch-sit dumbness tests for cats.  With cats, you just have to take your chances and hope that if the cat is the brainy one, he or she will be a kind owner.